IM BAAAACK!

[sissy]

Even here it seems like marriages these days are looked upon as something to do today and not thinking about tomorrow or years to come .Just like having children for no reason but to have them ,they do grow up .Marriage is something you should feel strong about and your partner should feel the same .If you can do that without a license or piece of paper that says it then go for it .At least you know you are there for the long haul and have respect for each other .Love and respect always wins out no matter what .My hubby is Catholic and I would not convert and because of that back then they would not marry us in the Catholic Church .We got married in my church in the chapel and my hubby did not have to convert to my religion .Catholic church offered to marry us after we were married 15 years and I did not have to convert ,either there laws changed or they figured I was safe .I gave my sons there options but out of respect for my mother in law and father in law I did have them baptised as catholic .

 

[sissy]

Oh and i chose not to take the Catholic Church up on there offer .I will live in sin :cheerful: in there eyes .Father Moran told me this in Saint Cecelia 's church in Iselin NJ ,when we both refused his offer .

 

[Nepen]

Congratulations!

 

[Dave 54]

Even here it seems like marriages these days are looked upon as something to do today and not thinking about tomorrow or years to come .Just like having children for no reason but to have them ,they do grow up .Marriage is something you should feel strong about and your partner should feel the same .If you can do that without a license or piece of paper that says it then go for it .At least you know you are there for the long haul and have respect for each other .Love and respect always wins out no matter what .My hubby is Catholic and I would not convert and because of that back then they would not marry us in the Catholic Church .We got married in my church in the chapel and my hubby did not have to convert to my religion .Catholic church offered to marry us after we were married 15 years and I did not have to convert ,either there laws changed or they figured I was safe .I gave my sons there options but out of respect for my mother in law and father in law I did have them baptised as catholic .

Hear hear sissy my foster brother Helmut is in the same boat as his wife is Catholic, both Val and I love each other dearly and are in it for the long haul, as I said 22/12/13 is our silver anniversary of living together both in health and then in both our cases sickness Val will slowly end up in a wheel chair due to her Muscular Dystrophy.
She says most guys would probably done a runner as it was in our second year we found out she had it.
My words to her were it changes nothing and our love will find a way around it.
Then she decided aganst children as there was too much of a risk of child being born with her condition again I said the same, so now we have our cat family and we are like uncle and aunt to our friends kids.
The latest is she now has to use wheeled walker to get around (we are still together) love is eternal and we are looking forwards to our next 25 years together .

rgrds

Dave

 

[sissy]

Hard when you are hit with all those decisions Dave and you are a good person and you are very lucky people to have each other .In the last year with hubbies health concerns and almost loosing him 3 times it is scarey .He is 61 and I keep telling him that I will make sure he is around for our 50 th anniversary .It has left me with a lot of work around here but I manage and try to not show him just how hard it is .But I am sure he knows any ways .But we all are stronger than we know . :cheerful:

 

[Dave 54]

I'm sure he knows that sissy and that he will be with you if he possibly can be , health is a factor any of us tend to take for granted but sadly non of us know for sure if we will have it as we grow older.
But the important thing is you have been there for him in his hour of need and I just know he respects you for being strong for him.
We all have this inner strength we dont know we have and I feel that the lesson Jason if he's following his wonderful thread will be learning from the lessons we have found beset us as we grow older.
Sadly none of us know our alloted span on planet earth as our friend found when she had developed lung cancer just a few days after she had buried her mother to pancreatic cancer two years ago.
Sadly though she bravely fought it, it justs wasnt to be and she herself passed away just 4 months after.
In this case she drew an inner strength from her friends and remaining family.
I remember the last time we saw her four days before she passed the pain she was in. But even then she drew on our 30 years of friendship, all she could do was smile swear twice she was all but spent.
We spent that hour of what was to be our last visit holding a hand and a foot proffered by her to show the great respect she had for us being there.
Val held her hand I her foot she was in so much pain that I couldnt hold the other hand we trying to will that awful disease into us so as to take away her pain.
But what a wonderful affair her funeral was she left us all a meaningful message through music and bright clothes there was even her final Joke when she arrived in a coffin brilliantly spray painted as a pint of guinness.
So we must take what when can of life before it is taken away from us, stand by our partners and show strength through both thick and thin.
When we ourselves doubt we have it because we find that we have and its one of those lessons we must learn its all about love for one another , respect for each other ,inner strength and being there for each other while we can.
I for oe know that love is eternal and that we all meet again be that in some other life or if the church is right in heaven , personally I look to the eastern teachings of life death and rebirth in another encarnation to seek out oour soul mates again.

rgrds

Dave
If those lessons are learned then you find you can carry on when all things are going wrong.

 

[addy1]

My previous husband became disabled two years after our wedding, never thought of leaving, he passed 18 yrs later. I told him and my new honey, marriage is forever.

 

[sissy]

The Amish cry when I child is born and celebrate when the end comes ,at least that was what I was brought up learning from my mom mom and pop pop .(Grandparents )A child was a blessing plucked from the heavens and then given back at the end .Kinda strange when you type it or say it .They are simple people.

 

[CountryEscape]

I have a friend who has a child that is 100% disabled from birth. Her husband could not handle it, divorced her when the child was 2. She has been his sole caretaker for the last 18 years. She is the minority, as I believe many parents would have let the State take care of their children. This young man is helpless to do anything, has never talked, cannot hold his head up or use his hands or legs. He has no mental capacity of any use. But, she loves him and takes him places with her. He is a joy to be around, always smiling and making his gurgly sounds when he is happy. I love being around him. Then, she finally found a guy that didn't run the other way when he learned about her son. And, this new boyfriend was in a farm accident about a month ago, lost part of his leg! I know my friend, she will stick by him forever! What a lady she is.

 

[Dave 54]

I feel that some of us are lucky to have such dedicated loved ones what a wonderful woman she must be, our friend that passed was like that she stood by you through thick and thin no matter what your prolem was she would be there for you, its a cruel joke thats she was taken like that leaving a 7 year old daughter a child she was told she would never have.
Should she need us in later life and we are still alive I for one would move heaven and earth to help her..
As I type this I'm minded of a picture frame off to my right that Carrie sent us about friendship and how ours meant to her to her it moved us so much that we framed it and out of the 30 years I knew her (val came along a little later).
We took it out on the day of her funeral to add her order of service in the celibration of her life we will one day present it to her daughter.

rgrds

Dave

 

[Sharon Goode]

Congrats! We have been married 37 years and he is still my best friend. Do we want to kill each other on a weekly basis, you bet. But at the end of the day, I still thank God for making me so lucky. In marriage and in pond keeping, it takes patience and time to get it right.

 

[CountryEscape]

Cool how you compared a marriage and pond keeping, Sharon! Very appropriate ... and true. :blueflower:

 

[HTH]

Congratulations Jason. I wish you and your bride decades of happiness.